Dialdirections

Juno and NetZero are both owned by United Online. They have several similarities, but to be sure feelings don't get hurt, they will both get their time in the spotlight.

Hi all! Nik again here, pulling another all-nighter, listening to the wonderful silence of my boys sleeping.

Show of hands time. Who watched the ever-too-short-lived "Dog Eat Dog," the newest challenge reality TV show on NBC last season? C'mon.I won't tell anyone. Those that know what the heck I'm talking about HAVE to remember a scary lil' guy named Widow, and his hilarious "jog" on the treadmill over the famous Dog Eat Dog pool. (I'll be more than happy to describe it in detail to anyone interested.)

I bring this up because of the power of advertising. It's been over 8 months since I've seen this show, and yet I remember very clearly the ever-watched NetZero clock that Brook Burns (one of the many beautiful people on Baywatch) was constantly making reference to.

Odd that an Internet Service Provider would choose to advertise itself by making itself paraphernalia for a game show. It's like Bob Barker telling contestants to speak into his "Sony Microphone" or Alex Trebek reminding the players to write their answers in the form of a question on their "Gateway Monitors" during Final Jeopardy.

Yet, NetZero was on to something. They want to keep their costs down, and have no problem with swallowing their pride to do it.

Founded July 1997, NetZero started out being free. I mean free, with unlimited hours! Whoa, what a concept. But something wasn't working as planned, because they quickly put a limit of 40 hours into the free plan. And now, they've whittled it down to 10 measly hours a month. Almost 4 years later in March 2001, one of two things happened. Either NetZero couldn't pay their electricity bill, or the head honchos got greedy, because they introduced their Platinum Service. Translation: Pay us $10 a month and we'll stop stalking you with our ads.

As far as customer service, NetZero offers the exact same service as Juno.com, so I won't bore you with the same ranting and raving I included in that review. I will say that NetZero offers the bare minimum required of them, and no more. Heaven forbid they make themselves available to us common-folk. But, as my annoyingly optimistic friends point out, you get what you pay for.

Okay, Pros and Cons time (prepare to get deja vu if you've read my review of Juno.com. They're essentially twins, owned by the same company). Let's start with the FREE SERVICE:

PROS:

Um, it's FREE
Takes 2 minutes to download
Compatible with most instant messaging services
Did we cover the FREE thing?
CONS:

You get kicked off lots
Have to put up with banner ads EVERYWHERE
Play "21 questions" just to sign on
Only 10 hours of online time a month (no more potty breaks, gang)
Slow downloads
Ok now let's do the Platinum Service, $9.99/month

PROS:

Unlimited access
Almost half the price of the bigger ISP's
Fewer ads than the free service
Easy set up
CONS:

Has had problems with Windows 2000
Lots of complaints about tech support
Limited browser capability
Peak hour connection problems